2008년 12월 19일 금요일

영어 단어 외우기 원리를 알자.

영어 단어 외우기를 효율적으로 하기 위해서는 우선 기억 원리를 알필요가 있다.
그러한 기억 원리들이 구체적으로 적용된 성공사례들을 통해 기원원리의 타당성도 점검해 보아야 한다.
이러한 이론적인 영어 단어 외우기 원리에 대한 이해를 바탕으로 우리가 학습을 할때
단지 영어 단어 외우기 에 그치지 않고 학습 전반에 걸친 외우기에 적용될 수 있음을 깨닫게 될것이다.
영어 단어 외우기를 효율적으로 수행하기 위해서는 전통적인 방식으로 영어단어 외우기를 시도함과 동시에
비약적으로 발전한 컴퓨터의 도움을 받아 영어 단어 외우기를 병행할 필요도 있다.
최근들어 훌륭한 영어 단어 외우기 프로그램이 눈에 띄어 그 프로그램을 글 후미에서 간략히 소개해 본다.
인간의 기억원리
사용자 삽입 이미지

인간의 기억은 감각기억,단기기억,장기기억으로 나누어진다.
감각기억은 오감을 통해 들어온 정보가 아주 잠시동안 보관되는 창고의 역활을 한다.
단기기억은 감각기억에 들어온 정보 중에서 우리에게 의미있는 것만을 의식적으로 선택하여 약18초 정도로 기억하는 역활을 한다.
장기기억은 감각기억으로 들어와 단기기억에서 처리된 내용이 반복된 암기나 정교화의 단계를 거쳐 저장되며 오랫동안(어떤 경우 평생) 저장되고 기억되는 장소이고 기억 용량도 엄청나다.

우리가 공부한 학습정보를 궁극적으로 저장해야 하는 기억장소는 바로 장기기억이다.
인간의 오감을 통해 초당 들어오는 엄청난 정보에서 우리가 필요한 정보를 선택적으로 기억하고 이를 반복기억하여 결국 장기기억으로 전환시킨다.
따라서 학습에는 반드시 반복기억의 과정이 있어야 한다.

인간의 장기기억은 도서관에서 책을 분류하는 방식으로 기억된다. 그래서 기억되어야 하는 정보를 분류하여 대분류,소분류를 나누어 기억하는 것이 필요하다.
또 한 기억되어야 하는 정보에 이를 수 있는 다양한 경로 즉, 관련 정보를 연관하여 기억해야 더욱 효율적이다. 예를 들어 책의 목차를 알고 공부를 하거나 마인맵처럼 하나의 정보를 직,간접적으로 생각할 수 있는 다양한 정보를 연관하여 기억하는 것이 더욱 효율적으로 장기기억에 저장시키고 장기기억에서 정보를 출력하는 방법이 된다.


영어단어 외우기 방법


인간은 long-term memory(장기기억)고 하는 일종의 대뇌 filing system을 가지고 있다.
어휘 학습이란 결국 long-term memory에 어휘를 기억시키는 것을 의미한다.
Long-term memory에 저장할 수 있는 용량(capacity)에는 한계가 있고
또, 저장했다고 해서 영원히 기억되지도 않는다.
그렇다면 어떻게 해야 오랫동안 지워지지 않도록 어휘를 장기 저장할 수 있을까?

다음의 7가지 방법을 추천한다.

1. Repetition

하나의 어휘는 시차를 두고, 서로 다른 문맥 속에서 약 7회 이상을 반복 만나야
long-term memory에 제대로 기억된다고 한다.
이렇게 해야 비로소 그 단어가 내재화되고 자동화된다는 뜻이다.
단어장에 단어와 뜻을 적어 놓고 이를 여러 번 반복 암기하는
전통적인 어휘 학습법은 최선의 방법이 아니란 점을 잊지 말자.

2. Retrieval     

저장한 어휘를 회상해 보는 것을 말한다. 가만히 저장만 해두고 검색하거나 회상하지
않으면 long-term memory에 저장되었던 어휘도 사라질 수 있다.
기억해 둔 어휘를 회상해 보는 대표적인 활동은 회화나 작문을 통해
그 단어를 사용해 보는 것이다.
회상과 관련해서 한 가지 유의할 점이 있다.
단어장을 만들 때 영어 어휘와 그것의 우리말 해석을 너무 가까이 붙여놓지 말자.
영어 단어와 그것의 모국어 해석을 한 눈에 들어오도록 정리를 해두면
회상해볼 수 있는 기회가 생기지 않는다.
또 그냥 묵독보다는 소리내어 읽자.
소리내어 읽으면 나중에 회상을 더 잘 할 수 있다는 연구결과가 있다.

3. Spacing

어떤 간격으로 복습을 하거나 회상을 하는 것이 이상적일까?
한자리에서 또는 짧은 시차를 두고 여러 번 반복하는 것보다는 비교적 긴 시차를 두고
그 단어를 다시 만나거나 사용을 통해 회상하는 것이 더 잘 기억된다.
조금 전 새로 익힌 단어라면 한 시간, 세 시간 뒤에 다시 한번 복습하고 이렇게 다시
복습한 단어는 2-3일 후, 그 다음은 일주일 후처럼 시차를 두고 복습하는 것을 말한다.

4. Use

사용보다 더 좋은 복습/회상 방법은 없다. 어휘 학습과 관련된 명언이 있다.
“Use it or lose it.”이 바로 그것이다. “사용하라 그렇지 않으면 잊어버린다”

5. Cognitive depth

어떤 어휘에 관해서 발음/형태/뜻/용법 등에 관해 주의(attention)의 집중 강도가 크면
클수록 잘 기억된다. 단어장에 적어놓은 철자와 뜻을
슬쩍 한 번 보는 것 정도로는 기억이 크게 강화되지 않는다.
철자를 보고 발음도 해 보자. 그리고 철자만 보고 뜻을 회상해 보자.
반대로 뜻만 보고 그 단어의 철자를 떠올리고 발음도 해 보자.
이렇게 그 단어에 대한 주목의 강도를 높이고, 생각을 깊이하면 할수록
그 단어를 오해 기억할 수 있게 된다.
뭐니뭐니해도 그 단어에 대해 주목의 강도를 높이는 방법은
그 단어를 이용하여 작문을 해보는 일임을 잊지 말자.

6. Attention

어휘를 오디오 테이프로 듣는 것은 기억에 어떤 효과가 있을까?
오디오 테이프를 틀어놓고 자면 어휘 학습에 도움이 된다는 주장은 속설인가 사실인가?
단순히 수동적으로 듣기만 하는 방식은 기억에 별 효과가 없다는 연구 결과가 있다.
왜 그럴까? 이에 대해서는 위 5번 항목의 cognitive depth가 훌륭한 대답이 될 수 있을 것 같다.
어휘든, 문법 혹은 구문이든 이것이 내재화되려면
의식적인 주목(consciousness raising or noticing)이란 과정이 필요하다.
욕설이나 성에 관한 단어를 다른 단어에 비해 더 잘 기억하고 회상하는 것은 바로
a high degree of attention을 거치기 때문이다.

그럼 어휘 학습을 위해 오디도 테입은 어떻게 활용하면 좋을까?
다음과 같은 방법들을 활용해 보라. 모두 그 어휘에 attention의 강도를 높이는 방식이다.

우선, 휴지(pause) 사이사이의 의미 덩어리를 따라 발음해 본다.
둘째, 휴지(pause) 사이사이의 의미 덩어리 단위로 마음 속에서 우리말로 통역을 해본다.
셋째, 휴지(pause) 사이사이의 의미 덩어리 단위나 문장 단위로 받아쓰기를 해본다.

7. Imaging

남이 만들어 놓은 이미지보다는 학습자 스스로 이미지를 만들어 보는 것이 중요하다.
추상적인 어휘든 구체적인 어휘든 상관없다.
가령 the name of the game(가장 중요한 것; 문제의 본질)이란 숙어라면 game site에
들어가 menu를 바라보면서 어떤 ‘게임의 이름’을 선택하는 것이 좋을까,
그것이 가장 중요한 데...‘라는 이미지를 스스로 떠올려 보거나,
2002년 월드컵 축구에서 한국-미국 전을 떠올리면서 ’가장 중요한‘
경기임을 생각해 보는 것도 이미지화의 한 방법이 될 수 있을 것이다.


영어 단어 암기 구체적 방법론 (예일대에 특차합격한 박승아의 단기간에 영어 단어 외우기 방법)
오랜 시간 틈틈이 공부하는 게 영어단어 정복의 정도라지만 가끔은 짧은 시간 안에 많은 양의 단어를 소화해야 하는 경우가 있다. 나도 그런 적이 있다. 미국 대학으로 진로를 바꾸고 급작스레 SAT를 준비해야 했을 때가 그 경우였다.

시 험을 열흘 남짓 남겨둔 시점에서 SAT 책을 들여다보던 나는 단어 교재를 보고 당황을 했다. 단어라면 나도 꽤나 많이 안다고 자신하고 있었는데, 처음 보는 생소한 단어들이 의외로 많았다. SAT용 단어가 따로 있다더니 그 말이 무슨 뜻인지 알 것 같았다. 미국 현지에서 쓰는 일상용어와 미국 문화에 대한 지식이 없으면 해결되지 않는 단어들도 많았고, 이미 알고 있는 단어라도 제2, 제3의 의미까지 알지 못하면 놓치는 것들이 있었다.

예를 들어 ‘pedestrian'은 보행자라는 뜻으로 흔히 쓰이는데, SAT 시험에서는 이 단어의 두 번째 뜻인 'common, dull, ordinary (평범한, 단조로운)‘의 뜻으로 주로 쓰였다. 그러므로 이런 것들도 모두 다시 체크해야 했다.

가지고 있던 두 권의 교재에서 잘 모르거나 뜻이 헷갈리는 단어들을 뽑아 보았다. 3500개가 나왔다. '이것들을 어떻게 해결해야 하나.' 선택은 하나였다. 바로 벼락치기. 대안이 없었다. 시험을 이틀 앞두고 시내로 가서 단어장으로 쓸 빈 카드를 샀다. SAT 시험용 단어카드를 만들기 위해서였다.

지 난 여름 잠깐 한국에 갔다가 TV에서 주부들을 대상으로 하는 아침 프로그램을 본적이 있었는데, 그날 초대 손님은 미국의 사관고등학교로 유학을 갔다가 하버드에 나란히 진학한 쌍둥이 형제였다. 이들이 자신의 공부 경험담을 들려주었는데, 시중에서 파는 SAT 단어카드를 구입해 공부했다는 이야기를 듣고 가슴을 쳤다. 뉴질랜드에선 그런 것은 구경해 못해 봤기 때문이다. 하기야 SAT 교재도 없어 엄마에게 부탁해 서울에서 샀는데, 말해 무엇 하겠는가? 그런 게 있었다면, 당시 시험을 준비할 시간이 없어 발을 동동 구르던 내게 얼마나 큰 도움이 되었을까, 하고 지금도 생각한다.

그날 빈 단어카드들를 사서 집으로 온 나는 3500개 단어 정복에 돌입했다. 먼저 앞면에 단어를 적고, 뒷면에는 뜻풀이를 1,2,3번째 의미까지 적었다. 연상되는 그림이 있으면 재빨리 그려 넣었다. 특히 중요하다고 생각되는 단어에는 형광펜으로 표시를 해 두었다. 그렇게 3500개를 모두 만든 뒤, 100장씩 묶어 서른 다섯 묶음으로 나누었다. 그리고 한 묶음씩 들고 차례로 보며 외우기 시작했다. 몹시 무식한 방법처럼 들리겠지만 그날 내가 한 것을 소개해 보겠다.

① 묶음 1의 단어카드를 들고 앞과 뒤를 완전히 외운 뒤 한 장씩 옆에 쌓아둔다. 100장이 쌓이면 반복해서 한번 씩 더 외우고, 다 됐다 싶으면 책상 맨 가장자리로 밀어 놓는다.
② 묶음 2의 100장을 ①과 같은 방법으로 외운 뒤, 묶음 1과 합쳐 200장을 다시 한번 반복해 준 뒤 책상 한쪽으로 밀어 놓는다.
③ 묶음 3의 100장을 ①과 같은 방법으로 외운 뒤, 묶음 1과 2와 3을 합쳐 300장을 다시 한번 외워준 뒤 책상 한쪽으로 밀어 놓은다. 묶음 4와 5도 같은 방법으로 한 다음, 500장을 합쳐 외우는 것이 끝나면 책상 밑으로 그 500장을 내려 놓는다. 여기서 500장 묶음을 단위로 책상 아래로 옮기는 것은, 일단 눈에 보이지 않는 곳으로 골칫덩이들을 치워줌으로써 '이 만큼은 해치웠다!‘라는 성취감을 주기 위한 것이다. 그 전에 100장씩 책상 한쪽으로 밀어놓는 것도 같은 효과를 위해서다.
④위의 ①에서 ③까지를 일곱 법 거듭하면 카드 서른 다섯 묶음이 모두 책상 밑으로 들어가게 된다.
⑤이것을 다시 모두 책상 위로 올려놓고 한 묶음씩 점검에 들어간다. 단어의 뜻이 생각나면 왼쪽, 잘 모르겠으면 오른쪽에 놓는다. 나의 경우 이때 700여개가 오른쪽에 쌓였다.
⑥ 왼쪽의 카드들은 상자 안에 집어 넣고, 남은 700장을 100장씩 묶어 일곱 묶음으로 나눈다. 그리고 다시 ①에서 ③까지를 700장이 다 쌓일 때까지 반복해 준다. ⑦책상 밑으로 700장이 다 내려가면 다시 올려놓고 한 묶음씩 점검에 들어간다. 단어의 뜻이 생각나면 왼쪽, 아직 모르겠으면 오른쪽으로 놓는다. 나의 경우 이때 120개가 오른쪽에 남았다. 왼쪽의 카드들은 역시 상자에 넣어준다.
⑧남은 단어를 위와 같은 방법으로 외우고 반복한 다음 다시 점검한다. 이때는 카드가 많지 않기 때문에 책상 밑으로 내려놓을 필요가 없다. 왼쪽의 카드는 상자 속에 넣고 오른쪽에 남은 카드를 가지고 다시 위의 과정을 반복한다.

이렇게 하다 보니 어느 순간 내 책상위에는 한 장의 카드도 남아있지 않게 되었다. 시간을 보니 시작한 지 꼬박 28시간이 지나 있었다.

영어 단어 외우기 도구
영어 단어 외우기를 효율적으로 하기 위해서는 여러 방법이 있으나 영어 단어 외우기를
효율적으로 도와 주는 그런 도구들이 필요하다.
지금까지 나와 있는 영어 단어 외우기 프로그램들은 많은 부분 도움을 주지 못한게
사실이다.
무엇보다도 영어 단어 외우기 프로그램들이 전체적으로 단순하고 기능적인 면도
매우 부족하여 실제로 사용하기에는 아쉬운 부분들이 많다.
여러 영어 단어 외우기 프로그램들을 사용하였지만 최근에 프리웨어 인 별이란
영어 단어 외우기 프로그램을 사용해 보고 상당부분 기능에 만족스럽다.
영어 단어를 외우기 위한 다양한 정보들을 제공하여 영어 단어 외우기를 시도하는
모든 사람에게 충분히 활용 될 수 있을 꺼라 생각된다.
별이란 영어단어 외우기 프로그램을 다운로드 하기 위해서는 다음을 클릭하여
해당 사이트에서 다운로드 할 수 있다.
전체적인 인터페이스는 다음과 같다.

사용자 삽입 이미지
메인창(1번)

별이의 기본창입니다.재생목록들의 정의와 의미를 출력하며 재생목록을 컨트롤한다.
이 창을 종료하면 별이가 종료된다.

재생목록창(2번)

재생할 목록(ex:단어)의 정의와 의미의 리스트를 나열한다.

음악창(3번)

학습에 도움이 되는 white noise나 배경음악을 플레이한다.
별이는 가볍고 심플한 MP3 재생엔진을 가지고 있어 MP3플레이어로서 뛰어난 역활을 수행한다.

사전창(4번)

사용자가 지정한 특정 웹서버 쿼리를 통해 인터넷에 존재하는 웹사전을 해당 재생목록에
대해 자동으로 보여준다.
웹사전에 발음재생 기능을 있을 경우 별이는 자동으로 발음을 재생한다.

예제창(5번)

사용자가 지정한 특정 웹서버 쿼리를 통해 재생목록에 해당하는 예제를 보여준다.


노트창(6번)

해당 재생목록에 대해 사용자가 사전에 작성한 노트를 보여주며 편집할 수 있다.
별이 노트는 블로그를 작성하 듯이 쉽고 간편하게 작성할 수 있으며 인터넷에 있는 각종
멀티미어와 텍스트정보를 드래그&드랍으로 빠르게 링크시킬 수 있어 강력한 멀티미디어
노트 기능을 지원한다.

이미지창(7번)

사용자가 지정한 특정 이미지검색 서버에 쿼리를 통해 재생목록에 해당하는 이미지를 보여준다

에이젼트(8번)

에이젼트 캐릭터가 TTS(text-to-speech)를 통해 재생목록을 해당언어로 읽어준다.
다양한 캐릭터를 다운받아 설치 할 수 있다.

편입 공부 방법

편입 수학의 경우 기존의 고등학교 수학이랑은 다르다고 보시면 됩니다.


고등학교때 배우던 수학말고 따로 배운다고 생각을 하면되지요~~

초등학교 수학이랑 중학교 수학이 다르듯이 편입수학 또한 기존의 수학이랑 다르기 때문에 중고등학교 수학처럼 힘들꺼라는 생각도 할수 있지만.. 전혀 별개이기 때문에 새로 배운다고 생각을 하시면 되지요^^


간단히 기초가 필요하지가 안다고 생각을 하시면 됩니다

편입 수학의 경우는 아래와 같은 유형입니다.


정확한 출제경향 파악하여 대비, 대학별 기출문제 반복하여 출제

편입 수학은 고교과정의 기초실력을 거의 필요로 하지 않는다.
수학에 대한 두려움 때문에 편입수학을 외면하는 것은 잘못된 편견이다.
편입수학은 출제범위가 제한되어 있으므로 일정기간만 공부하면 정복할 수 있다.
다양한 문제를 많이 공부하는 것이 아니라 풀었던 문제를 반복하면 된다.

편입수학은 이공계 학생에게 전공공부를 위한 기초적 내용인 미적분학, 선형대수, 공업수학이
기본출제영역이므로 4, 5개월 정도면 자신 있게 모든 문제를 풀 수 있다.
중요하다고 생각되거나 자주 사용하는 내용이 반복하여 출제되므로 오직 자신의 의지와 노력만 있으면
그것으로 충분하다.

미적분학, 선형대수, 공업수학 수준으로 출제

전체적인 출제 범위를 보면 세부적으로 보면,
미분법에서는 역삼각함수의 계산 및 쌍곡선함수의 성질, 도함수의 정의, 여러 가지 함수의 미분방법,
고계도함수(곡률 포함), 극한(로피탈 정리), Taylor급수와 Maclaurin급수, 미분의 응용
(함수의 그래프와 최대값, 최소값), 속도와 가속도 등이다.
적분법은 부정적분의 계산(치환적분, 삼각치환, 부분적분, 유리함수의 적분, 무리함수의 적분, 기타
여러가지 함수의 적분 등), 정적분의 정의와 계산, 정적분과 도함수(극한, 무한급수의 합), 이상적분, 극좌표,
정적분의 응용(면적, 곡선의 길이, 회전체의 체적, 회전체의 겉넓이, Pappus 정리)등이다.
선형대수에서는 행렬의 정의및 곱, 행렬식의 계산, 역행렬, rank와 일차연립방정식, 내적 및 외적,
공간도형의 방정식(직선, 평면), 고유치 고유벡터, 일차독립 및 기저(basis), 선형사상등이다.
편미분, 중적분에서는 편미분의 계산, 합성함수 및 음함수의 미분법, 방향도함수, 공간에서 접선 및 접평면,
2변수함수의 Taylor급수 및 Maclaurin급수, 2변수함수의 극대와 극소 등이 출제된다.
중적분의 적분 순서변경, 극좌표를 이용한 계산, 공간도형의 체적, 곡면의 표면적, 3중적분(원기둥좌표계)
등이다.
급수에서는 멱급수의 수렴, 발산 판정법(적분, p급수, 비교, 비율 판정법과 교대급수 판정법), 절대수렴 및
조건수렴, 수렴구간 구하기등이다.
공업수학의 분야인 미분방정식에서는 미분방정식의 정의, 급수에 의한 계산, 1계 미분방정식(변수분리형, 완전미분형, 1계선형, 동차형 등), 2계제차선형미분방정식( 상수계수, 코시)과 비제차(역연산자법, 론스카인 방법), 연립미분방정식이다.
Laplace변환에서는 함수의 공식 및 정리, 공식과 역변환 방법, 계단함수의 성질등이다.
복소수에서는 공학에서 사용하는 오일러공식에 의한 복소수의 여러 가지 형태, resdue를 이용한
복소선적분을 다룬다.
선적분면적분에서는 3가지 유형의 선적분과 3가지유형의 면적분을 다룬다.
퓨리에 급수에서는 기함수, 우함수를 이용한 급수전개방법이다.

여기서...
한양대는 선형대수와 미분방정식에서 출제가 많으며, 복소수와 선적분, 면적분이 적게 출제되는 편이다.
중앙대는 미분법, 적분법과 복소수가 많이 출제되며, Laplace변환은 전혀 출제 되지 않으며,
미분방정식과 편미분 중적분에서는 출제경향이 적은 편이다.
상명대는 미분, 적분에서 출제가 많으며 수학교육과만 시험을 치르므로 공업수학의 분야는 출제되지 않는다.
마찬가지로 연세대 응용통계학과는 공업수학의 분야는 출제되지 않는다.
홍익대는 90년대초에 출제 경향과 공과대학만 수학을 보기 때문에 전체적인 범위를 해두는 것이 좋을 듯하다.

수학은 논리의 학문이기 때문에 미분법이 잘 연습이 되어야 나머지가 자연스럽게 해결된다.
중간부터 시작하면 어려움이 많고 체계성이 없어져서 자신감이 결여된다.
각 분야를 1개월 공부할 분량으로 생각한다면 가장 알맞을 것이다.


그외 편입 영어의 경우는 학원도 중요하지만 무억보다 중요한건 자신이 할려는 의지가 있어야 됩니다.


영어의 경우 꾸준한 공부가 중요하지요~~

요령이 있다면 아래와 같은 방법이 있습니다.^^

참고하세요~


☞ 영어 공부의 요령 15가지 방법

요령1.
영어만은 당일치기가 안 됩니다.
짧은 시간이라도 매일 조금씩 공부하세요.

요령2.
자신이 좋아하는 방법이나 교재를 사용하여 공부하세요.

요령3.
부분을 이해하려고 애쓰지 말고 전체를 파악하려고 애쓰세요.

요령4.
100% 이해하려고 애쓰지 말고 전체를 파악하려고 애쓰세요.

요령5.
절대 번역하려 들지 마세요.
우리말을 거치지 말고 곧바로 영어로 생각해 반응하세요.

요령6.
감명 깊었던 영어의 명문들을 통째로 외우세요.
이런 무기를 하나 가지고 있으면 문법, 회화, 영작 어디에나
응용할 수 있습니다.

요령7.
눈, 입, 귀 등 신체기관을 총 동원하여 온 몸으로 영어를 배워보세요.

요령8.
모든 생활의 무대를 학습의 장으로 활용하세요.

요령9.
엄청난 보물이 숨겨져 있는 사이버 영어교육 사이트를 활용하세요.

www.ybmsisa.co.kr 시사영어사에서 운영하는 영어 사이트
www.englishpractice.com 읽기, 쓰기, 듣기, 말하기 중심은 사이트
www.ipopcorn.co.kr/education/index.asp 중고생들 취향의 영어 공부

요령10.
공부한 것을 실생활에 자주 활용해 보세요.


요령11.
실력이 모자란다면 이전 단계로 되돌아가서 기초부터 쌓아보세요.

요령12.
뻔뻔스러워지세요. 영어는 모국어가 아니므로, 잘못하는 것이
당연합니다.

요령13.
언어는 한꺼번에 배울 수 있는 것이 아니므로, 인내심을 갖고
꾸준히 계속하세요.

요령14.
친구들끼리 영어스터디 그룹을 만들어보세요.

요령15.
중간중간 중지하고 공부한 부분을 되돌아 보는 시간을 가지세요.
공부한 것을 효과적으로 저장하기 위해서는 정리할 시간이
필요합니다.

☞ 영어공부의 영역별 대처 방법을 찾아라


영어의 경우는 아래 교재를 참고하시면 되며~~

동영상 강의 많은 사이트라.. 동영상이 아닌글로 되어있는 자료라면 몰라도 이부분은.. 저도 자세히는 모르겠네요^^

아무튼 아래 교제를 참고하세요^^


1. 어휘

어휘 : 우선순위영단어(편입의 밑바탕)
어휘 : 능률 VOCABULARY 고교영단어 / 이찬승 저
어휘 : 수학능력시험 직결 우선순위 영단어 / 안용덕 저

여기까지가 편입어휘의 가장 밑바탕입니다..

그 다음 기출어휘 프린트해서 무조건 다 외워버립니다.(학원 다니시는분은 학원기출어휘프린트)

여기까지 외우도 상위권대학말구는 상관없습니다.

그냥 바로 md33000 같은 교재로 하는분들에게 뭐라고 할수는 없지만

처음부터 너무 어려운 교재로 선택하면 금방 질려버립니다...

해커스나 각종 22000,33000 교재들은 한장에 50%정도 알때 공부하시는것이 가장 효과적입니다.

또한 항상 동의어 묻는 단어문제들과 같이 공부하세요..

<교재추천>

책제목

출판사

지은이

가격 (단위:원)

MD 33000

지수

문덕

19,000

신경향 22000

넥서스

김일곤

12,200

프린시피아(어원)

유풍

성기근

25,000

신경향보카22000

시사YBM

임해영

16,000

스마트워드1+11

넥서스 C.L

Brantley

29,500

스마트워드 베이직

''

''

''

거로보카워크샵

거로

김정기

25,000

패리언보카

패리언아카데미

고창록

19,500

프린시피아
vocabulary gold

유풍 출판사

성기근

15,000

실전고시
vocabulary

박영사

성기근

23,000

2. 문법

초보자가 하기에 가장 적당한듯 싶습니다.(MAN TO MAN 기본영어)

처음엔 성문기초영문법, 맨투맨 기초,기본 책.토플책에 나와있는 문법.

하나 택하셔서 꼭 한번이상 마스터하세요.(학원 문법교재만 몇번 마스터해도 됨.)

그다음엔 토플문법문제 혹은 학원문법문제 무조건 문제 많이 풀것

단 틀린문제는 항상 반복해서 아실때까지 공부하세요..

<교재추천>

이성철스리즈 문법

해인사

이성철

18,000

이성철문법연습

해인사

이성철

5,000

신경향시사 토플

시사YBM

임해영,송석홍

21,000

신경향아카데미

토플 아카데미

이호열

21,000

코어 토플

규장각

김채환

20,000

해커스

해커스어학연구소

16,900

반석토플 GRAMMER

반석출판사

차진순

7,000

PASS TOEFL 유형별 영문법

네오시스

신성일

15,000

3. 독해

위에서 택일 하여서 독해문제 많이 풀어보세요.....주제별로요....

또한 어느정도 실력이 되면 영자신문도 꼭 보세요...

<교재추천>

코어 리딩

규장각

김채환,고현석

15,000

거로 리딩

거로

김정기

17,000

프린시피아 영어구문독해

유풍

성기근

20,000

PASS TOEFL 실전 독해

네오시스

신성일

14,000

프린시피아고시 Reading Skill

유풍 출판사

성기근

25,000

Yoo's TIme's

표현 출판사

유종건

???

PASS TOEFL 실전 표현

네오시스

신성일

5,000

<기타 교재추천>

김영로 영어 순해1

고려원

김영로

8,000

김영로 영어 순해2

''

''

5,500

김영로 영어 순해3

''

''

''

김영로 영어 속독

넥서스

''

11,000

슈프림 GRE

종합출판사

유시일

22,000

해커스토플

해커스 어학연구소

14,900

문법독해(금색딱지)

16,900



참고로 동영상 강의가 아니더라도 편입영어나 편입수학에 관한 자료를 구하신다면 아래 출저를 참고하시면 예전의 자료들이 있으니 참고하세요

Love Actually Script

[ Scene #1 ]

(Man): 'Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the arrivals gate at Heathrow airport. General opinion started to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don't see that. Seems to me that love is everywhere. Often it's not particularly dignified or newsworthy but it's always there. Fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends. When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know, none of the phone calls from people on board were messages of hate or revenge, they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I've got a sneaky feeling, you'll find that love actually is all around.'

[ Scene #2 ]

Billy: I feel it in my fingers I feel it in my toes Feel it in my toes, yeah Love is all around me And so the...

Joe: I'm afraid you did it again, Bill.

Billy: It's just I know the old version so well, you know.

Joe: Well, we all do. That's why we're making the new version.

Billy: Right, OK, let's go. I feel it in my fingers In my fingers I feel it in my toes Feel it in my toes, yeah Love is all ar...

Billy: Oh, fuck, wank, bugger, shitting, arsehead and hole. Start again. I feel it in my fingers In my fingers I feel it in my toes Feel it in my toes, yeah Christmas is all around me All around me And so the feeling grows So the feeling grows It's written in the wind In the wind It's everywhere I go Everywhere I go So if you really love Christmas Love Christmas Come on and let it snow Come on and let it...

Billy: This is shit, isn't it?

Joe: Yup, solid gold shit, Maestro.

[ Scene #3 ]

Jamie: God, I'm so late.

Kataya: It's just round the corner, you'll make it.

Jamie: You sure you don't mind me going without you?

Kataya: No, really. I'm just feeling so rotten.

Jamie: I love you.

Kataya: I know.

Jamie: I love you even when you're sick and look disgusting.

Kataya: I know. Now, go or you will actually miss it.

Jamie: Right. Did I mention that I love you?

Kataya: Yes, you did. Get out, loser.

[ Scene #4 ]

Daniel: Karen, it's me again. I'm sorry, I literally don't have anybody else to talk to.

Karen: Absolutely. Horrible moment, though. Can I call you back?

Daniel: Of course.

Karen: Doesn't mean I'm not terribly concerned that your wife just died.

Daniel: Understood. Er, bugger off, call me later.

Karen: So what's this big news?

Daisy: We've been given our parts in the nativity play and I'm the lobster.

Karen: The lobster?

Daisy: Yeah.

Karen: In the nativity play?

Daisy: Yeah. First Lobster.

Karen: There was more than one lobster present at the birth of Jesus?

Daisy: Durr.

[ Scene #5 ]

Colin: Best sandwiches in Britain.

Colin: Try my lovely nuts?

Colin: Beautiful muffin for a beautiful lady.

Colin: Morning, my future wife.

[ Scene #6 ]

man1: OK, you can stop there. Thanks.

man2: I need a couple of orange gels.

Jack: By the way, he introduced me as John but everyone calls me Jack.

Judy: Oh, fine. Nice to meet you, Jack. He got me right, though. I'm just Judy.

Jack: Great, Just Judy!

[ Scene #7 ]

Peter: No surprises?

Mark: No surprises.

Peter: Not like the stag night?

Mark: Unlike the stag night.

Peter: Do you admit the Brazilian prostitutes were a mistake?

Mark: I do.

Peter: And it would've been much better if they'd not turned out to be men?

Mark: That is true. Good luck, kiddo.

[ Scene #8 ]

Press: Prime Minister, over here!

PM: Thank you.

Annie: Welcome, Prime Minister.

PM: Woh! I must work on my wave. How are you?

Annie: How are you feeling?

PM: Erm... Cool. Powerful.

Annie: Would you like to meet your household staff?

PM: Yes, I would like that very much indeed. Anything to put off actually running the country.

Annie: This is Terence. He's in charge.

Terence: Good morning, sir.

PM: Good morning. Had an uncle called Terence - hated him - I think he was a pervert. But I very much like the look of you.

Annie: This is Pat.

PM: Hello, Pat.

Pat: Good morning, sir. I'm the housekeeper.

PM: Oh, right. I should be a lot easier with me than with the last lot. No nappies, no teenagers, no scary wife.

Annie: And this is Natalie. She's new, like you.

PM: Hello, Natalie.

Natalie: Hello, David. I mean, sir. Shit, I can't believe I've just said that. And now I've gone and said "shit". Twice. I'm so sorry, sir.

PM: It's fine, it’s fine. You could've said "fuck" and we'd have been in real trouble.

Natalie: Thank you, sir. I did have an awful a premonition I was gonna fuck up on my first day. Oh, piss it!

Annie: Right, I'll get my things and then let's fix the country, shall we?

PM: Yeah, I can't see why not.

Pat: It's all right.

Natalie: Did you see what I did?

Pat: Yes, I did.

Natalie: I just went "blurh".

PM: Hello there.

Annie: I'm right over here.

PM: Yeah, I'm in here. OK. Good. Thank you. Ah. Oh, no. That is so inconvenient.

[ Scene #9 ]

Father: In the presence of God, Peter and Juliet have given their consent and made their marriage vows to each other. They declared their marriage by the giving and receiving of rings. I therefore proclaim that they are husband and wife.

Peter: And you resisted the temptation for surprises.

Mark: Yeah, I'm mature now.

(song) ( Wedding March becomes La Marseillaise) Love, love, love Love, love, love Love, love, love...

Juliet: Did you do this?

Peter: Er, no.

(song) Love, love, love, love There's nothing you can do that can't be done

Peter: Oh, it...

(song) There's nothing you can sing that can't be sung There's nothing you can say but you can learn how to play the game It's easy All you need is love All you need is love All you need is love, love Love is all you need...

Peter: Look, it's Pikey.

[ Scene #10 ]

Jamie: Hello! What the hell are you doing here?

Brother: Oh, I just popped over to borrow some old CDs.

Jamie: The lady of the house let you in, did she?

Brother: Yeah.

Jamie: Lovely, o-o-obliging girl.

Brother: Yeah.

Jamie: Just thought I'd pop back and see if she was better. This is good.

Brother: Oh.

Jamie: Listen, erm, I've been thinking. I think we ought to take Mum out for her birthday on Friday. What do you think? I just feel we've been bad sons this year.

Brother: Okay, Sounds fine. A bit, you know,boring, but fine.

(girl): Hurry up, big boy! I'm naked and I want you at least twice before Jamie gets home.

[ Scene #11 ]

(Juliet): I am so happy to see you!

Colin: Delicious delicacy?

Mark: Er, no, thanks.

Colin: Taste explosion?

Colin: Food?

Nancy: No, thanks.

Colin: Yeah, a bit dodgy, isn't it? Looks like a dead baby's finger. Oooh. Oh. Tastes like it, too. I'm Colin, by the way.

Nancy: I'm Nancy.

Colin: Wicked.

Colin: What do you do, Nancy?

Nancy: I'm a cook.

Colin: Ever do weddings?

Nancy: Yes, I do.

Colin: They should've asked you to do this one.

Nancy: They did.

Colin: God, I wish you hadn't have turned it down.

Nancy: I didn't.

Colin: Right.

[ Scene #12 ]

Colin: I've just worked out why I can't find true love.

Tony: Why is that?

Colin: English girls. They're stuck up, you see. And I am primarily attractive to girls, you know, who are cooler, game for a laugh. Like American girls. So I should just go to America! I'd get a girlfriend there instantly. What do you think?

Tony: I think it's crap, Colin.

Colin: That's where you're wrong. American girls would dig me with my cute British accent.

Tony: You don't have a cute British accent.

Colin: Yes, I do! I'm going to America.

Tony: Colin, you're a lonely, ugly arsehole. Accept it.

Colin: Never. I am Colin, God of Sex. I'm just on the wrong continent, that's all.

[ Scene #13 ]

man: Bit of quiet while we finish the lighting, guys!

Jack: I turn a thought wouldn’t make it. The traffic today was just...

Judy: Unbelievable.

AD: Judy, could you take the top off this time? Lighting and camera need to know when we're gonna see the, erm, nipples and when we're not.

Judy: Yes, OK. Right. At least it's nice and warm in here.

Jack: Not always the case, is it? I was standing in for Brad Pitt once on Seven Years In Tibet ...

Judy: Yes, yeah.

Jack: Bloody freezing...

AD: Sorry, Guys, time's tight and we have to get the actors in.

Judy: Fine.

Jack: I promise I won't look.

(Director): Right, let's have another look at that, please.

AD: And Jerry says, if you could just put your hands on her breasts?

Jack: Oh, right, okay. Is that all right?

Judy: Yes. Yeah-fine.

Jack: I'll warm them up!

AD: And massage them, please.

Jack: Right. It's junction 13 that's just murder, isn't it? Total gridlock this morning.

[ Scene #14 ]

Daniel: Jo and I had a lot of time to prepare for this moment. Some of her requests, for instance, that I should bring Claudia Schiffer as my date to the funeral, I was confident she expected me to ignore. But others she was pretty damn clear about. When she first mentioned what's about to happen, I said, "Over my dead body." And she said, "No, Daniel, over mine." And as usual, my darling girl... and Sam's darling mum was right. So she's going to say her final farewell to you not through me but, inevitably, ever so coolly, through the immortal genius of the Bay City Rollers.

(On speakers): Bye bye baby, baby goodbye Goodbye baby, baby bye bye Bye bye baby Don't make me cry Goodbye baby, baby bye bye You're the one girl in town I'd marry Girl I'd marry you now if I were free I wish it could be I could love you but why begin it? Cos there ain't any future in it She's got me but I'm not free so...

[ Scene #15 ]

(From DJ booth): Bye bye baby, baby goodbye Goodbye baby, baby bye bye Bye bye baby, don't make me cry Goodbye baby, baby bye bye Wish I never had known you...

Sarah: Do you love him?

Mark: Er, er, what?

Sarah: No, l-I just thought I'd ask the blunt question in case it was the right one and you needed someone to talk to about it and no one had ever asked you so you never been able to talk about it even though you might have wanted to

Mark: No. No. No is the answer. Absolutely not.

Sarah: So that's a no, then?

Mark: Yes. Erm...This DJ, what do you reckon? The worst in history?

Sarah: Probably. I think it all hangs on the next song.

DJ: Now here's one for the lovers. That's quite a few of you, I shouldn't be surprised and a half.

(song) (S Club Juniors: Puppy Love) And they called it...

Mark: He's done it, it's official.

Sarah: Worst DJ in the world.

[ Scene #16 ]

Mia: Sarah's waiting for you.

Harry: Oh, yes, of course, erm...Great, er, good, good. How are you doing, Mia? Settling in fine? Learning who to avoid?

Mia: Absolutely.

Sarah: Harry?

Harry: Sarah, switch off your phone and tell me exactly how long it is that you've been working here.

Sarah: Two years, seven months, three days and, I suppose, what, two hours?

Harry: And how long have you been in love with Karl, our enigmatic chief designer?

Sarah: Um... Two years, seven months, three days and, I suppose, an hour and 30 minutes.

Harry: Thought as much.

Sarah: Do you think everybody knows?

Harry: Yes.

Sarah: Do you think Karl knows?

Harry: Yes.

Sarah: Oh, that is... that is bad news.

Harry: Why is it so.. thought that maybe the time had come to do something about it.

Sarah: Like what?

Harry: Invite him out for a drink then after about 20 minutes, casually drop in to the conversation the fact that you'd like to marry him and have lots of sex and babies.

Sarah: You know that?

Harry: Yes. And so does Karl. Think about it, for all our sakes. It's Christmas.

Sarah: Certainly. Excellent. Will do. Thanks, boss.

Karl: Hi, Sarah.

Sarah: Hi, Karl.

Kark: Excuse me.

Sarah: Babe. Absolutely, fire away. Mia, Mia, would you turn that down? What is that?

[ Scene #17 ]

DJ: That was the Christmas effort from the once great Billy Mack. Oh, dear me, how are the mighty fallen. I can safely put my hand up my arse and say that is the worst record I've heard this century... Oh, and coincidentally, I believe Billy will be a guest on my friend Mike's show in a few minutes' time. Welcome back, Bill.

Mikey: So Billy, welcome back to the airwaves. New Christmas single, cover of Love Is All Around.

Billy: Except we've changed the word "love" to "Christmas".

Mikey: Yes, is that an important message to you, Bill?

Billy: Not really, Mike. Christmas is a time for people with someone they love in their lives.

Mikey: And that's not you?

Billy: That's not me, Michael. When I was young and successful, I was greedy and foolish and now I'm left with no one, wrinkled and alone.

Mikey: Wow. Thanks for that, Bill.

Billy: For what?

Mikey: For actually giving a real answer to a question. It doesn't often happen here at Radio Watford, I can tell you.

Billy: Ask me anything, I'll tell you the truth.

Mikey: Best shag you ever had?

Billy: Britney Spears.

Joe: Wow.

Billy: No, only kidding! She was rubbish.

Mikey: OK, here's one. How do you think the new record compares to your old, classic stuff?

Billy: Come on, Mikey, you know as well as I do the record's crap. But wouldn't it be great if number one this Christmas wasn't some smug teenager but an old ex-heroin addict searching for a comeback at any price? Those young popsters come Christmas will be stretched out naked with a cute bird balancing on their balls and I'll be stuck in some dingy flat with me manager Joe, ugliest man in the world, fucking miserable because our fucking gamble didn't pay off. So if you believe in Father Christmas, children, like your Uncle Billy does, buy my festering turd of a record. And particularly enjoy the incredible crassness of the moment we try to squeeze an extra syllable into the fourth line.

Mikey: I think you're referring to "If you really love Christmas..."

Billy: " Come on and let it snow." Ouch.

Mikey: So, here it is one more time, the dark horse for this year's Christmas number one, Christmas Is All Around. Thank you, Billy. After this, the news. Is the new prime minister in trouble already?

[ Scene #18 ]

PM: OK. What's next?

Alex: The President's visit.

PM: Ah, yes, yes. I fear this is going to be a difficult one to play. Alex.

Alex: There's a very strong feeling in the party we mustn't allow ourselves to be bullied from pillar to posts, like the last government.

All: Here, here.

Jeremy: This is our first really important test, let's take a stand.

PM: Right. Right. I understand that but I have decided... not to. Not this time. We will, of course, try to be clever… But, Let's not forget that America is the most powerful country in the world. I'm not going to act like a petulant child.

Right -now who do you have to screw around here to get a cup of tea and a chocolate biscuit? Right.

[ Scene #19 ]

PM: Yup - come in.

Natalie: These have just come through from the Treasury...

PM: Uh-huh.

Natalie:.. and these are for you.

PM: Excellent. Thanks a lot.

Natalie: I was hoping you'd win, not that I wouldn't have been nice to the other bloke too. Just always given him the boring biscuits with no chocolate.

PM: Ha! Thanks very much. Thanks... Natalie. Oh God, come on, get a grip. You're the Prime Minister, for God's sake.

[ Scene #20 ]

Jack: So what do you reckon to our new prime minister?

Judy: Oh, I like him. I can't understand why he's not married, though.

Jack: You know the type, he's married to his job. Either that or gay as a picnic basket.

AD: Excuse me, Judy, if you could just lower the nipples and cheat them a bit to the left?

Judy: OK.

Jack: I have to say, Judy, this is a real pleasure, it's lovely to find someone I can actually chat to.

Judy: Thank you!

Jack: Oh, well, you know.

Judy: And ditto.

Jack: Thank you.

AD: The move again, please, Judy.

Judy: Ooh, sorry.

Jack: Oh, God, sorry. You all right?

[ Scene #21 ]

Colin: Exciting news!

Tony: What?

Colin: I've bought a ticket to the States. I'm off in three weeks.

Tony: No.

Colin: Yes! To a fantastic place called Wisconsin.

Tony: No!

Colin: Yes! Wisconsin babes, here comes Sir Colin!

Tony: No, Col! There ARE a few babes in America, I grant you, but they're going out with rich, attractive guys.

Colin: Nah, Tone, you're just jealous. You know perfectly well that any bar anywhere in America contains ten girls more beautiful and more likely to have sex with me than the whole of the United Kingdom.

Tony: That is total bollocks. You’ve actually gone mad.

Colin: No, I'm wise. Stateside I am Prince William without the weird family.

Tony: No, Colin, no!

Colin: Yes!

Tony: Nyet!

Colin: Da!

Tony: Nein!

Colin: Ja, darling!

[ Scene #22 ]

Harry: Right, the Christmas party, not my favourite night of the year and your unhappy job to organise.

Mia: Tell me.

Harry: It's basic, really. Find a venue, over-order on the drinks, bulk buy the guacamole and advise the girls to avoid Kevin if they want their breasts unfondled.

Mia: Wives and family and stuff?

Harry: Yes. I mean, not children. But their wives and girlfriends, etc… Oh, Christ, you haven't got some horrible six-foot, tight-T-shirt-wearing boyfriend you’ll be bringing, have you??

Mia: No. I'll just be hanging around the mistletoe, hoping to be kissed.

Harry: Really? Right.

[ Scene #23 ]

Daniel: He now spends all the time in his room. I mean, he'll be up there now.

Karen: There’s nothing unusual about that My horrid son...

Daniel: Bernard?

Karen: Bernard. Stays in his room all the time. Thank goodness.

Daniel: No, but Karen, this is all the time. I'm afraid that there's something really wrong, you know? I mean, clearly it's about his mum, but Christ, he might be injecting heroin into his eyeballs for all I know.

Karen: At the age of eleven?

Daniel: Well, maybe not his eyeballs, then. Maybe just his veins.

The problem is his mum always used to talk to him, you know, and... I don't know, this whole stepfather thing seems suddenly to somehow matter like it never did before.

Karen: Listen, it was always going to be a totally shit time. Just be patient. And maybe check the room for needles.

Daniel: And then when he sometimes does come out, it's obvious he's been crying. It was such a ridiculous waste. And if it's now going to ruin Sam's life as well... I just don't know.

Karen: Get a grip. People hate sissies. No one's ever gonna shag you if you cry all the time.

Daniel: Yeah. Absolutely. Helpful.

[ Scene #24 ]

Daniel: So, what's the problem, Samuel? Is it just Mum or is it something else, huh? Maybe school? Are you being bullied? Or is it something worse? Can you give me any clues at all?

Sam: You really want to know?

Daniel: I really want to know.

Sam: Even though you won't be able to do anything to help?

Daniel: Even if that's the case, yeah.

Sam: OK. Well... truth is, actually... I'm in love.

Daniel: Sorry?

Sam: I know I should be thinking about Mum all the time and I am but the truth is, I'm in love. I was before she died and there's nothing I can do about it.

Daniel: Aren't you a bit young to be in love?

Sam: No.

Daniel: Ah, well. OK, well... I'm a little relieved.

Sam: Why?

Daniel: Because l... thought it'd be something worse.

Sam: Worse than the total agony of being in love?

Daniel: Er... No, you're right. Total agony.

[ Scene #25 ]

Karl: Night, Sarah.

Sarah: Night, Karl. Yeah, absolutely. Free as a bird. Fire away.

[ Scene #26 ]

Jamie: Alone again. Naturally.

[ Scene #27 ]

man: I'll deal with it.

PM: Mm.

PM: Ah. Natalie.

Natalie: Sir.

PM: Thanks. Natalie. Erm, I'm starting to feel... uncomfortable about us working in such close proximity every day and me knowing so little about you, it seems elitist and wrong.

Natalie: Well, there's not much to know.

PM: Well, erm, where do you live, for instance?

Natalie: Wandsworth. The dodgy end.

PM: Ah, my sister lives in Wandsworth.

Natalie: Oh.

PM: So which exactly is the dodgy end?

Natalie: Right at the end of the high street, Harris Street, near the Queen's Head.

PM: Right, yes, that is dodgy.

Natalie: Hm.

PM: Erm, and you live with your husband? Boyfriend? - Three illegitimate but charming children?

Natalie: No. I've just split up with my boyfriend actually, so I'm back with my mum and dad for a while.

PM: Ah. Sorry.

Natalie: No, it's fine. I'm well shot of him. - He said I was getting fat.

PM: I beg your pardon?

Natalie: He said no one'd fancy a girl with thighs the size of tree trunks. Not a nice guy, actually, in the end.

PM: Right... You know, erm... being Prime Minister, I could just have him murdered.

Natalie: Thank you, sir. I'll think about it.

PM: Do. The SAS are absolutely charming. Ruthless, trained killers are just a phone call away. Oh, God. Did you have this kind of problem? Yeah, course you did, you saucy minx.

[ Scene #28 ]

Daniel: So, let's go. We can definitely crack this. Remember, I was a kid once, too. So, come on, it's someone at school. Right?

Sam: Yeah.

Daniel: Uh-huh. Good, good. And what does she, he, feel about you?

Sam: SHE doesn't even know my name. And even if she did, she'd despise me. She's the coolest girl in school. And everyone worships her because she's heaven.

Daniel: Good. Good. Well, basically you're fucked, aren't you?

[ Scene #29 ]

Ant: Hi there and welcome back. So, three weeks till Christmas, looks like the real competition is gonna be Blue.

Billy: I saw them on the show last week. They weren't very nice about my record.

Dec: No. Little scamps.

Billy: But very, very talented musicians.

Ant: Yeah. Billy, I understand you've got a prize for our competition winners.

Billy: Yes, I have, Ant or Dec. It's a personalised felt-tip pen.

Dec: Oh, great.

Billy: It's brilliant. It even writes on glass, so if you've got a framed picture, like, for instance, this one of Blue, you can just write on it.

Dec: Er, a lot of kids watching, Billy.

Billy: Oh, yes.

Billy: Hiya, kids. Here's an important message from your Uncle Bill - don't buy drugs. Become a pop star and they give you them for free.

Dec: And I do believe it's a commercial break. Thanks goodness. We'll see you soon. Bye!

[ Scene #30 ]

girls: Look at him! Eurh!

Mark: Just a minute. Actually, they're not funny. They're art.

Mark: OK, let's say, er, Thursday, my place.

Peter: Great. …but for now, I've got Juliet on the other line. Can I patch you through? she wants to ask you a favour.

Mark: OK, fine.

Peter: Thanks and, er, be nice.

Mark: I'm always nice.

Peter: 'You know what I mean, Marky, be friendly.'

Mark: I'm always...

Juliet: 'Mark?'

Mark: Hi. How was the honeymoon?

Juliet: oh It was great. Thanks for the gorgeous sendoff.

Mark: So, what can I do for you?

Juliet: It's only a tiny favour. I've just tried the wedding video and it's a complete disaster. It's come out all blue and wibbly.'

Mark: I'm sorry.

Juliet: And I remember you filming a lot on the day - and I just wondered if I could look at your stuff.

Mark: Oh no – look - To be honest, I didn't really...

Juliet: Please. All I want is just one shot of me in a wedding dress that isn't bright turquoise.

Mark: Okay , - I'll have a look - but to be honest I'm pretty sure I wiped it, so don't get any hopes up. 'Must go.'

[ Scene #31 ]

Harry: Any progress with our matchmaking plans?

Sarah: No. I've done fuck-all and never will because he's too good for me.

Harry: How true.

Sarah: Stop.

Harry: And of course, your mobile goes.

Sarah: Hello. Hi. How you doing?

Harry: So, how's the Christmas party going?

Mia: Good. Think I've found a venue. Friend of mine works there.

Harry: What's it like?

Mia: Good. Good. It's an art gallery. Full of dark corners for doing dark deeds.

Harry: Oh. Right. Good. Well, I suppose I should take a look at it or something.

Mia: You should.

[ Scene #32 ]

Jamie: Ah, bonjour, Eleonore.

woman: Bonjour, Monsieur Bennett. Welcome back. And this year you bring a lady guest?

Jamie: No. There's a change of situation. Just me.

woman: Oh. Am I sad or not sad?

Jamie: I think you're not surprised.

woman: And you stay here till Christmas?

Jamie: Yeah, yeah.

woman: Good. Well, I find you a perfect lady to clean the house. This is Aurelia.

Jamie: Ah. Er, bonjour, Aurelia.

Aurelia: Bonjour.

Jamie: (French) Er, je suis, er, tres heureux de vous avoir ici.

woman: Unfortunately, she cannot speak French, just like you. She's Portuguese.

Jamie: (ltalian) Ah, ah, buongiorno. Eusebio, er, er... (Pidgin Spanish) Er, molto bueno...

woman: I think she's ten years too young to remember a footballer called Eusebio. And "molto bueno" is Spanish.

Jamie: Right. Anyway, it's nice to meet you and...

woman: And perhaps you can drive her home after her work?

Jamie: Oh, absolutely, yes.

Con-Con grande, er, pl-plesura.

woman: Which is what? Turkish?

[ Scene #33 ]

Jamie: (Pidgin Portuguese) Bello. Er, bella. Er, mon-montagno, arbore... No, right. Silence is golden. As the Tremeloes said. Clever guys, although I think the original version was by Frankie Valli And The Four Seasons. Gr-great band. ( High-pitched humming: Silence Is Golden) Oh, shut up.

[ Scene #34 ]

(Press): Mr President! Over here, sir! What will you be talking about?

PM: Mr President, welcome.

US Pr: It's a pleasure to meet you.

PM: Come on through. I'm sorry your wife couldn't make it by the way.

US Pr: So is she. Although she would have been kind of lonely, I;m sure…

PM: Yes. Pathetic, isn't it? Just never been able to tie a girl down. I’m not sure politics and dating really go together.

US Pr: Really? I've never found that.

PM: Yes, well, the difference is that you're sickeningly handsome, whereas I look increasingly like my Aunt Mildred. I’m very jealous of your plane, by the way.

US Pr: Thank you. We love that thing. I’ll tell you.

PM: Ah, Natalie. Hi.

US Pr: Morning, ma'am. How's your day so far?

US Pr: Excellent. My goodness, that's a pretty little son of a bitch. Did you see those pipes?

PM: Yes, she's terrific… at her job.

minister1: No, absolutely not. We cannot and will not consult on that either.

Alex: That is unexpected.

US Pr: Well, it shouldn't be. The last administration made it perfectly clear. We are just being consistent with their policies.

Alex: But, with all respect, they were bad policies.

PM: Right, Thanks, Alex. I don't think we're making progress here. Let's, erm... move on, shall we?

PM: Well, now, that was an interesting day.

US Pr: I’m sorry if our line was firm - there's no point tiptoeing around today, and then just disappointing you for four years. I have plans and I plan to see them through.

PM: Absolutely. There is one final thing I think we should look at - very close to my heart. If you could just give me a second.

US Pr: I'll give you anything you ask for. As long as it's not something I don't wanna give.

PM: Hi.

US Pr: It's great Scotch.

Natalie: I'll, erm... I'll be going, then.

US Pr: Er, Natalie, I hope to see much more of you as our countries work toward a better future.

Natalie: Thank you, sir.

[ Scene #35 ]

PM: Er, yes, Peter.

Peter(press): Mr President, has it been a good visit?

US Pr: Very satisfactory indeed. We got what we came for and our special relationship is still very special.

press2: Prime Minister?

PM: I love that word "relationship". Covers all manner of sins, doesn't it? I fear that this has become a bad relationship. A relationship based on the President taking what he wants and casually ignoring all those things that really matter to, erm... Britain. We may be a small country but we're a great one, too. The country of Shakespeare, Churchill, the Beatles, Sean Connery, Harry Potter. David Beckham's right foot. David Beckham's left foot, come to that. And a friend who bullies us is no longer a friend. And since bullies only respond to strength, from now onward, I will be prepared to be much stronger. And the President should be prepared for that.

Press: Mr. President!

[ Scene #36 ]

woman: It's your sister on line four.

PM: All right. Er, yes, I'm very busy and important, how can I help you?

Karen: Have you gone completely insane?

PM: You can't be sensible all the time.

Karen: You can if you're Prime Minister.

PM: It's the Chancellor on the other line.

Karan: It isn't!

PM: I'll call you back.

Karen: No, you won't! The trouble with being the Prime Minister's sister is it puts your life into rather harsh perspective. What did my brother do today? He stood up and fought for his country. And what did I do? I made a papier - mache lobster head.

Harry: What is this we're listening to?

Karen: Joni Mitchell.

Harry: I can't believe you still listen to Joni Mitchell.

Karen: I love her and true love lasts a lifetime. Joni Mitchell is the woman who taught your cold English wife how to feel.

Harry: Did she? Oh, well, that's good, I must write to her sometime and say thanks.

Karen: Now which doll for Daisy's little friend Emily? The one that looks like a transvestite, or the one that looks like a dominatrix?

[ Scene #37 ]

(DJ): 'It's almost enough to make you feel patriotic, 'so here's one for our arse-kicking prime minister. I think he’ll enjoy this. 'A golden oldie for a golden oldie.'

(song) ( Pointer Sisters: Jump) Hold me I'll give you all that you need Wrap your love around me You're so excited I can feel you getting hotter Oh baby I'll take you down, I'll take you down Where no one's ever gone before And if you want more If you want more, more, more Jump for my love Jump in And feel my touch Jump, if you wanna taste my kisses in the night then Jump for my love I'll take you down, I'll take you down Where no one's ever gone

PM: Yeah, erm, Mary, I’ve been thinking. Can we move the Japanese ambassador to four o'clock tomorrow?

Mary: Certainly, sir.

PM: Terrific. Thanks so much.

[ Scene #38 ]

Jamie: Erm. Would you like the last, er...?

Aurelia: (Portuguese) Thank you very much but no. If you saw my sister, you'd understand why.

Jamie: That's all right, more for me.

Aurelia: (Portuguese)Just don't go eating it all yourself, you're getting chubbier every day.

Jamie: I'm lucky - I've got of those constitution where I never put on weight. Hello. Oop. Sorry. Hello ?

[ Scene #39 ]

Jamie: Thank you.

Aurelia: (Portuguese) Nao! Eu peco imensa desculpa. Oh, no. Hold on.

Jamie: God, it's half the book. Oh, no.

Aurelia: Que desastre.

Jamie: Just leave them, please! They're not important. They're not worth it! Stop! Stop. Aa-ahh. It's all just rubbish. Just leave it. Oh, God, she's in. And now she'll think I'm a total spas if I don't go in too.

Aurelia: (Portuguese) Fuck - it's cold!

Jamie: Fuck - it's freezing! Fuck!

Aurelia: (Portuguese) This stuff better be good.

Jamie: It's not worth it, you know, it isn't bloody Shakespeare.

Aurelia: (Portuguese) I don't want to drown saving some shit my grandmother could have written.

Jamie: Just stop. Stop.

Aurelia: (Portuguese) What kind of an idiot doesn't do copies?

Jamie: I really must do copies. There'd better not be eels in here. I can’t stand eels…

Aurelia: (Portuguese) Try not to disturb the eels.

Jamie: Oh god, what the hell is that?

Jamie: Thank you. Thank you so much. I know. I'll name one of the characters after you.

Aurelia: (Portuguese) Maybe you could name one of the characters after me. Or give me 50% of the profits.

Jamie: Or I could give you 5% of the profits.

Aurelia: (Portuguese) What kind of book is it? Kind. Kind… Romance ?

Jamie: Yes. It's, erm...

Aurelia: Ah, er... (Portuguese) Thriller...crime...

Jamie: (Portuguese) Yes. Si. (English) Crime. Crime, murder.

Aurelia: (Portuguese) Frightening?

Jamie: Er, scary? Yes, sometimes scary. And, er, sometimes not. Mainly scary how bad the writing is.

Aurelia: Mm. (Portuguese) I'd better get back to work.

Jamie: Ah.

Aurelia: (Portuguese)And then later you'll drive me home?

Jamie: Sure. It's my favourite time of day... driving you.

Aurelia: (Portuguese) It's the saddest part of my day, leaving you.

Jamie: Sorry.

[ Scene #40 ]

(TV) : 'And coming up later this morning, it's this guy...'There's no beginning, there'll be no end Cos on Christmas' the bad grandad of rock'n'roll, 'here at 10:30. Do not switch off.'

Juliet: Banoffee pie?

Mark: No, thanks.

Juliet: Thank God. You would've broken my heart if you'd said ‘yes’.

Mark: Oh right, well, lucky you.

Juliet: Can I come in?

Mark: Er, yeah, well, I'm a bit busy but...

Juliet: I was just passing and I thought we might check that video thing out. I thought I might be able to swap it for some pie, or maybe Munchies?

Mark: Actually, I was serious I don't know where it is. I'll have a poke around tonight, and then…

Juliet: Mark, can I say something?

Mark: Yeah.

Juliet: I know you're Peter's best friend and I know you've never particularly warmed to me. Look, don't, don't argue. We've never got… friendly. But I just wanted to say, I hope that can change. I'm nice. I really am. Apart from my terrible taste in pie and... It would be great if we could be friends.

Mark: Absolutely. Absolutely.

Juliet: Great.

Mark: Doesn't mean we'll be able to find the video, though. I had a real search when you first called and couldn't find any trace of it, so...

Juliet: There’s one here that says "Peter and Juliet's Wedding". Do you think we might be on the right track?

Mark: Er, yeah, well... Wow. That-that could be it.

Juliet: Do you mind if l just...?

Mark: I've probably taped over it. Almost everything has episodes of West Wing on it now…

Juliet: Oh, bingo. That's lovely. Well done, you. Oh, that's gorgeous. Thank you so much, Mark, this is exactly what I was hoping for. I look quite pretty. You've stayed rather close, haven’t you… They're all of me.

Mark: Yeah. Yeah... Yes.

Juliet: But... you never talk to me. You always talk to Peter. You don't like me.

Mark: Hope it's useful. Don't show it around too much. It needs a bit of editing. Look, I've got to get to a...Iunch. Early lunch. You can just show yourself out, can't you? It's a...self-preservation thing, you see.

[ Scene #41 ]

(song) ( Dido: Here With Me) Oh I am what I am I'll do what I want But I can't hide And I won't go I won't sleep And I can't breathe Until you're resting here with me And I won't leave And I can't hide I cannot be Until you're resting here And I won't go And I won't sleep And I can't breathe Until you're resting here with me

[ Scene #42 ]

PM: Yeah. Annie, my darling, my dream, my boat. Ah... Need you to do a favour for me.

Annie: Of course. Anything for the hero of the hour.

PM: Don't ask me why, and don't read stuff into this, it's just a weird personality thing. But, erm, you know Natalie who works here?

Annie: The chubby girl?

PM: Ooh, would we call her chubby?

Annie: I think there's a pretty sizeable arse there, yes, sir. Huge thighs.

PM: Yeah. Well, whatever, erm... I'm sure she's a lovely girl but I wonder if you could, erm... redistribute her?

Annie: It's done.

[ Scene #43 ]

Daniel: Hey, Sammo. Can't sleep?

Sam: I got some terrible news today.

Daniel: Let's have it.

Sam: Joanna's going back to America.

Daniel: Your girl's American?

Sam: Yes, she's American. And she's not my girl. And she's going back to America. That's the end of my life as I know it.

Daniel: That is bad news. Well, we need Kate and we need Leo, and we need them now. Come on.

Man(TV): 'Hold on. Hold on. 'Keep your eyes closed. 'Do you trust me?'

Woman(TV): 'l trust you.'

Daniel: Do you trust me?

Sam: I trust you.

Daniel: Fool!

Sam: Get off, you big bully.

Man(TV): 'All right, open your eyes.'

Daniel: You know, Sammy, I'm sure she's unique and extraordinary but general wisdom is that in the end, there isn't just one person for each of us.

Sam: There was for Kate and Leo. There was for you. And there is for me. She's the one.

Daniel: Fair enough. And her name's Joanna?

Sam: Yeah, I know. Same as Mum.

[ Scene #44 ]

PM: Yeah.

secretary: Prime Minister.

PM: Thank you very much.

[ Scene #45 ]

Jamie: (Pidgin Portuguese) Oh. Appolo... Erm, appologia. Grande, er... grande familio, grande tradizione de Christmas presents. Stupido. Well, goodbye.

Aurelia: (Portuguese) Thank you.

Jamie: Erm, it was, erm...

Aurelia: (Portuguese) I will miss you. And your very slow typing... and your very bad driving.

[ Scene #46 ]

Sam: Daniel! I have a plan.

Daniel: Thank the Lord. Tell me.

Sam: Well, girls love musicians, don't they?

Daniel: Uh-huh.

Sam: Even the weird ones get girlfriends.

Daniel: That's right. Meat Loaf definitely got laid at least once. For God's sake, Ringo Starr married a Bond girl.

Sam: Whatever. There's this big concert at the end of term and Joanna's in it. And I thought if I was in the band and played absolutely superbly, there’s a chance that she might fall in love with me. What do you think?

Daniel: I think it's brilliant, I think it's stellar. Apart from the one obvious tiny little baby little hiccup.

Sam: I don't play a musical instrument?

Daniel: Yes, sir.

Daniel: A tiny, insignificant detail.

[ Scene #47 ]

(song) ( Sugababes: Too Lost In You) You look into my eyes I go out of my mind I can't see anything Cos this love's got me blind I can't help myself I can't break this spell I can't even try Baby, I'm too lost in you Caught in you Lost in everything about you So deep I can't sleep, I can't...

Karen: I suppose I'd better do the duty round.

Harry: You're a saint.

Mia: Any chance of a dance with the boss?

Harry: Yes, sure, sure. As long as your boyfriend doesn't mind.

Mia: NOT my boyfriend.

Harry: You're looking very… pretty tonight.

Mia: It's for you.

Harry: Sorry?

Mia: It's all for you, sir.

[ Scene #48 ]

Parkinson: Well, this must be very exciting moment for you, fighting for the Christmas number one. How's it looking so far?

Billy: Very bad indeed. Blue are outselling me five to one but I'm hoping for a late surge. And, if I reach number one, l promise to sing a song stark naked on TV on Christmas Eve.

Parkinson: Do you mean that?'

Billy: Of course I do, Michael. Do you want a preview, You old flirt?

Parkinson: That'll never make number one.

[ Scene #49 ]

Sarah: I suppose it's his job to dance with everyone, isn't it?

Karen: Some more than others.

Karl: Just one dance? Before we run out of chances.

Sarah: Who, me?

Karl: Unless you just...

Sarah: No! No! Good. Yes. Thanks.

(song) You're a good girl And that's what makes me trust you like I do Late at night I talk to you Hey You will know the difference when...
(
Norah Jones: Turn Me On) Like a flower Waiting to bloom Like a light bulb In a dark room I'm just sitting here Waiting for you To come on home And turn me on Like the desert Waiting for the rain Like a schoolkid Waiting for the spring I'm just sitting here Waiting for you to come on home And turn me on Turn me on

[ Scene #50 ]

Karl: Well, then. I better go.

Sarah: OK.

Karl: Good night.

Sarah: Good night.

Karl: Actually... I don't have to go.

Sarah: Right. Good.

Karl: I mean...

Sarah: No, that's good. Just, erm, would you excuse me for one second?

Karl: Sure.

Sarah: Just one second. Erm, OK, that's done. Erm... Why don't you come upstairs in about ten seconds?

Karl: Ten seconds.

Sarah: Ten seconds.

Sarah: Just tug it.

Karl: OK.

Karl: You're beautiful.

Sarah: I-I'd better answer that. Hello. Hi. Hello, darling. No, no, I'm not busy. No, fire away. Right. Yes, I... I'm not quite sure it's gonna be possible to get the Pope on the phone tonight but... Yes. Yes, I'm sure he's very good at exorcism but... Well, I'm sure... Jon Bon Jovi is as well and I'll definitely look into it. OK? OK, I'll talk to you later. All right, bye- bye. Sorry about that.

Karl: No, it's fine.

Sarah: It's my brother, he's not well, he calls a lot.

Karl: I'm sorry.

Sarah: No, it's fine. It's fine. I mean, it's not really fine - it is what it is. And sort of there being no parents now and us being over here, it's my job to keep an eye on him. Not my ‘job’, obviously, I'm glad to do it...

Karl: That's OK. I mean, life is full of interruptions and complications. So...

Karl: Will it make him better?

Sarah: No.

Karl: Then maybe...don't answer.

Sarah: Hey. How you doing? Right, right. Oh, no, please. Oh, please, please don't, little darling. Between the two of us we'll find the answer and it won't hurt any more. No, no. I'm-I'm not busy. I... Of course, if you want me to come over I will. Mm-hm. OK.

[ Scene #51 ]

Karen: That was a good night. Though I felt fat.

Harry: Oh don't be ridiculous.

Karen: It's true. Nowadays the only clothes I can get into were once owned by Pavarotti.

Harry: I always think Pavarotti dresses very well.

Karen: Mia's very pretty.

Harry: Is she?

Karen: You know she is, darling. Be careful there.

[ Scene #52 ]

Sarah: Have you been watching stuff on TV?

Sarah's brother: No…. Every night.

Sarah: Oh Good.

Sarah's brother: And every day. The nurses are trying to kill me.

Sarah: Nobody's trying to kill you, babe.

Sarah: Thank you. Don't do that, my darling. Thank you. Don't do that.

[ Scene #53 ]

Harry: Right. Back at three. Christmas shopping, never an easy or a pleasant task.

Mia: Are you going to get me something?

Harry: Er... I don't know, I hadn't thought. Where's Sarah, by the way?

Mia: She couldn't make it in today. Family thing.

Harry: There's a word for hangover I've never heard before. See you later.

Mia: Yes. Looking forward to it. A lot.

Harry: So, Are you going to give me something?

Mia: I thought I made it clear last night. When it comes to me, you can have everything.

Harry: So, erm, what do you need? Something along the stationery line? Are you short of staplers?

Mia: No. I don't want something I need. I want something I want. Something pretty.

Harry: Right. Right.

Karen: Sorry I'm late - had to drop off Bernie at rehearsal.

Karen: Right, listen, you keep yourself occupied for ten minutes while I do the boring stuff for our mothers.

Salesman: Thank you.

Guest: Thank you.

jewellery salesman: Looking for anything in particular, sir?

Harry: Yes...ahm. That necklace there… how much is it?

jewellery salesman: It's 270.

Harry: Erm, all right. Er, I'll have it.

jewellery salesman: Lovely. Would you like it...gift-wrapped?

Harry: Yes, all right.

jewellery salesman: Lovely. Let me just pop it in the box. There.

Harry: Look, could we be quite quick?

jewellery salesman: Certainly, sir. Ready in the flashiest of flashes. There.

Harry: That's great.

jewellery salesman: Not quite finished.

Harry: I don't need a bag, I'll put it in my pocket.

jewellery salesman: Oh, this isn't a bag, sir.

Harry: Really?

jewellery salesman: This is so much more than a bag. Ooh!

Harry: Could we be quite quick, please?

jewellery salesman: Prontissimo.

Harry: What's that?

jewellery salesman: A cinnamon stick, sir.

Harry: Actually, I really can't wait.

jewellery salesman: You won't regret it, sir.

Harry: Want a bet?

jewellery salesman: Tis but the work of a moment. There we go. Almost finished.

Harry: Almost finished. Are you gonna dip it in yogurt? Cover it with chocolate buttons?

jewellery salesman: No, sir, we're going to pop it in the Christmas box.

Harry: I don't want a Christmas box.

jewellery salesman: But you wanted it gift-wrapped.

Harry: I did but...

jewellery salesman: The final flourish.

Harry: Can I just pay?

jewellery salesman: All we need now...

Harry: Oh, God.

jewellery salesman:.. is a sprig of holly…

Harry: No, no, no, no. No bloody holly.

jewellery salesman: But sir...

Harry: Leave it. Leave it, just leave it.

Karen: Ooh! Loitering around the jewellery section, I see.

Harry: No. I was just looking around.

Karen: Don't worry. My expectations are not that high after thirteen years of Mr Oh-But-You-Always-Love-Scarves…

[ Scene #54 ]

Colin: Hey!

Tony: What are you doing here?

Colin: Had to rent out my flat to pay for my ticket.

Tony: You're not actually going ahead with this genuinely stupid plan?

Colin: Bloody am. Think this is full of clothes? Like hell it is. It is chock-a-block full of condoms.

[ Scene #55 ]

PD(Tony): Excellent. Excellent. Perfect, keep that going.

John: Look, erm... sorry for being a bit forward, but you don't fancy going for a Christmas drink, do you? I mean, nothing implied. We could just maybe go and see something Christmassy or something. Obviously if you don't want to you don't have to. I was just...I'm rambling now, sorry.

Judy: No. That would be lovely.

John: Oh, great. Yay!

John: You know, that is really great. Normally, I'm really shy about this sort of thing - takes me ages to get the courage up - so thank you.

[ Scene #56 ]

Karen: Explain to me again why you're so late?

Harry: Oh for heaven’s sake, woman - can't a man have any secrets?

Karen: Well, hurry up, we've been waiting for hours, it's the first ever preview.

Karen: It was a starry night in ancient Jerusalem and the baby Jesus was in his manger.

Man1: Sherlock Holmes is not a real detective.

Man2: (in Russian) Is this the way to the train station?

Man3: I would like half a pound of cherries.

woman1: I would like a one-day travel card.

Man4: Oh, my God,

Jamie: (in Portuguese) I've got a terrible stomachache. It must have been the prawns.

Man5: Milton Keynes has many roundabouts.

Jamie: My goodness, this is a very big fish! It tastes delicious!

(song) All alone on Christmas Nobody ought to be alone on Christmas All alone on Christmas Nobody ought to be alone on Christmas Tell me I've got to know Nobody ought to be alone on Christmas Don't leave me alone

[ Scene #57 ]

Tony: You'll come back a broken man.

Colin: Yeah, back broken from too much sex.

Tony: You are on the road to disaster.

Colin: No, I am on shag highway, heading west. Farewell, failure. America, watch out! Here comes Colin Frissell. And he's got a big knob

Colin: Take me to a bar.

Taxi driver: What kind of bar?

Colin: Just any bar. Just your average American bar.

Clock: Can I help you?

Colin: Yes. I'd like a Budweiser, please. King of beers.

Clock: Bud coming up.

Stacey: Oh, my God. Are you from England?

Colin: Yes.

Stacey: Oh... that is so cute. Hi, I'm Stacey. Jeannie?

Jeannie: Yeah?

Stacey: This is...

Colin: Colin. Frissell.

Jeannie: Cute name.

Stacey: Jeannie. He's from England.

Colin: Yep. Basildon.

Jeannie: Oh.

Stacey: Oh.

Jeannie: Wait till Carol-Anne gets here. She's crazy about English guys.

Stacey: Uh-huh.

Carol-Anne: Hey, girls.

Jeannie: Carol-Anne, come meet Colin. He's from England.

Carol-Anne: Well, step aside, ladies. This one's on me. Hey, gorgeous.

Stacey: That is so funny! What do you call that?

Colin: Er, bottle.

Girls: "Bottle."

Carol-Anne: What about this?

Colin: Er, straw.

Girls: "Straw."

Jeannie: What about this?

Colin: Table.

Jeannie: Table. The same.

Stacey: Oh, it's the same.

Carol-Anne: Where are you staying?

Colin: I don't actually know. I'll just check into a motel like in the movies.

Stacey: Oh, my God. Oh, my God, that is so cute.

Jeannie: No, no, no, listen. This may be a bit pushy cos we just met you but...why don't you come back and sleep at our place?

Carol-Anne: Yeah.

Stacey: Yeah.

Colin: Well, if it's not too much of an inconvenience…

Carol-Anne: Hell no! But there's one problem.

Colin: What?

Jeannie: Well, we're not the richest of girls, you know. So we just have a little bed and no couch . So you'd have to share with all three of us.

Carol-Anne: And on this cold, cold night it's going to be crowded and sweaty and stuff.

Stacey: And we can't even afford pyjamas.

Colin: No?

Jeannie: Which means...we would be naked.

Colin: No, no, I think it'd be fine.

Girls: Great.

Carol-Anne: Erm...The thing that's gonna make it more crowded...Harriet. You haven't met Harriet.

Colin: There's a fourth one?

Girls: Yeah.

Stacey: Don't worry, you're totally gonna like her cos she is "the sexy one".

Colin: Really? Wow.

Girls: Yeah.

Colin: Praise the Lord!

Carol-Anne: Oh, and he's a Christian.

All: Cheers.

[ Scene #58 ]

Karen: One present only each tonight. Who's got one for Dad?

Bernie: I have.

Harry: No, let Mummy go first.

Bernie: I'll get it.

Karen: No, no, no. I want to choose mine. I think I want...this one.

Harry: I have bought the traditional scarf as well but this is my other, slightly special, personal one.

Karen: Thank you. That's a real first.

Kids: Rip it!

Karen: What is it? I'm going to... All right, I'll rip it. God, that's a surprise.

Daisy: What is it?

Karen: It's a CD. Joni Mitchell, wow.

Harry: To continue your emotional education.

Karen: Yes. Goodness. That's great.

Harry: My brilliant wife.

Karen: Ha! Yes. Actually, do you mind if I just absent myself for a second? All that ice cream. Er... Darling, could you make sure the kids are ready to go? I’ll be back in a minute.

Harry: All right, take it easy.

Bernie: Mine first. Mine.

(song) ( Joni Mitchell: Both Sides Now) Moons and Junes And Ferris wheels The dizzy dancing way that you feel As every fairy tale comes real I've looked at love that way But now it's just another show And you leave 'em laughing when you go And if you care Don't let them know Don't give yourself away I've looked at love From both sides now From give and take And still somehow It's love's illusions that I recall I really don't know love I really don't know love at all Tears and fears And feeling proud To say I love you right out loud Dreams and schemes And circus crowds I've looked at life that way Oh but now old friends...

Karen: Oh, my God. It's a miracle. You're all dressed. Come on, come on, come on, we're horribly late. Come on, then. In the car. In the car.

[ Scene #59 ]

Daniel: Has she noticed you yet?

Sam: No. But you know the thing about romances - people only get together right at the very end…

Daniel: Of course.

Sam: By the way, I feel bad I never ask you how your love life’s going.

Daniel: Ha! No. As you know, that was a done deal long ago. Unless of course, Claudia Schiffer calls… in which case I want you out of this house straight away, you wee motherless mongrel.

Sam: Oh!

Daniel: No, no. We'll want to have sex in every room, including yours.

Male DJ: It's a rainy Christmas Eve all over the UK and the big question is who is number one on the Radio One chartshow tonight? Is it Blue or the unexpected Christmas sensation from Billy Mack? You might have guessed it although you may not believe it. It's Billy Mack. You are the champion! Shh.

[ Scene #60 ]

Man: Hi, Billy.

Billy: Hello.

Man: We're live across the nation and you're number one. How will you be celebrating?

Billy: I don't know. Er, either I could behave like a real rock and roll loser and get drunk with my fat manager... or, when I hang up, I'll be flooded by invitations to a large number of glamorous parties.

Man: Let's hope it's the latter. Here it is. Number one, from Billy Mack, it's Christmas Is All Around.

Billy: Oh, Jesus, not that crap again.

Woman: Bill, it's for you, babe.

Billy: Hello. Elton. O-Of course. Of course. Send an embarrassingly big car and I'll be there. It's gonna be a very good Christmas.

[ Scene #61 ]

Jack: Right.

Judy: I better be getting inside, actually. My mum and...you know.

Jack: Of course, yes. It's getting a bit cold. Erm... Well, good night.

Judy: Night.

Jack: Er... Er... OK.

Judy: All I want for Christmas... is you.

Jack: Right. Thank you. Good. Good night. Ha ha ha! Ho.

[ Scene #62 ]

Woman: Oh, look, everyone, it's Uncle Jamie.

Kids: Hi, Uncle Jamie!

Jamie: Yes, oh, splendid. It's lovely to see you all. And, er... I'm off, actually.

Woman: But Jamie, darling.

Jamie: Sorry. Man's gotta do what a man's gotta do.

Kids: I hate Uncle Jamie! I hate Uncle Jamie. I hate Uncle Jamie.

[ Scene #63 ]

Karl: Night, Sarah.

Sarah: Night, Karl.

Karl: I, er... Merry Christmas.

Sarah: Merry Christmas.

Sarah: Hi, babe, how's it going? Yeah. Is it all party, party, party down there?

[ Scene #64 ]

Daniel: Sam, time for dinner.

Sam: I'm not hungry.

Daniel: Sam, I've done chicken kebabs.

Sam: Look at the sign on the door.

Daniel: Right.

Sarah's brother: It's a little long.

[ Scene #65 ]

Juliet: I'll get it. Oh, hi.

Peter: Who is it?

Juliet: It's carol singers.

Peter: Give them a quid and tell them to bugger off.

(song) Silent night Holy night All is calm All is bright Round yon virgin Mother and child Holy infant So tender and mild Sleep in heavenly peace Sleep in heavenly peace Silent night Holy night Shepherds quake At the sight...

MARK’S <WITH ANY LUCK BY NEXT YEAR

CARD: I’LL BE GOING OUT WITH ONE OF THERE GIRLS

BUT FOR NOW, LET ME SAY

WITHOUT HOPE OR AGENDA

JUST BECAUSE IT’S CHRISTMAS

(AND AT CHRISTMAS YOU TELL THE TRUTH)

TO ME, YOU ARE PERFECT

AND MY WASTED HEART WILL LOVE YOU

UNTIL YOU LOOK LIKE THIS…>

Juliet: Merry Christmas.

(song) Glories stream From heaven afar Heavenly hosts sing alleluia Christ the saviour is born Christ the saviour is born

Mark: Enough. Enough now.

[ Scene #66 ]

Joe: What the hell are you doing here? You're supposed to be at Elton John's.

Billy: Well, I was there for a minute or two and then I had an epiphany.

Joe: Really?

Billy: Yeah.

Joe: Come on. Just come up. So what was this epiphany?

Billy: Erm, it...it was about Christmas.

Joe: You realized that it was all around.

Billy: No. I realized that Christmas is the time to be with the people you love.

Joe: Right.

Billy: And I realized that, as dire chance and fateful cock-up would have it, here I am, mid-fifties, and without knowing it, I've gone and spent most of my adult life with a chubby employee. And, much as it grieves me to say it, it might be that the people I love is, in fact... you.

Joe: Well, this is a surprise.

Billy: Yeah.

Joe: Ten minutes at Elton John's and you're gay as a maypole.

Billy: No, look. I'm serious here. I left Elton's and a hefty number of half-naked chicks with their mouths open in order to hang out with you at Christmas.

Joe: Well, Bill...

Billy: It's a terrible, terrible mistake, chubs... but you turn out to be the fucking love of my life. And to be honest, despite all my complaining... we have had a wonderful life.

Joe: Well... thank you. I mean, come on, it's been an honour. I feel very proud.

Billy: Oh, look, don't be a moron. Come on, let's get pissed and watch porn.

[ Scene #67 ]

Natalie: Dear sir, Dear David, 'Merry Christmas and I hope you have a very happy New Year. I'm very sorry about the thing that happened. It was a very odd moment and I feel like a prize idiot. Particularly because - if you can't say it at Christmas, when can you, eh? - I'm actually yours. With LOVE. xxx Your Natalie.

PM: Jack, yeah, I need a car. Right now. Thank you. Oh, don't wait up. I'd like to go to Wandsworth, the dodgy end.

Terry: Very good, sir. Harris Street. What number, sir?

PM: Oh, God, it's the longest street in the world and I have absolutely no idea.

PM: Hello, does Natalie live here?

Woman: No.

PM: Right, fine, thank you. Sorry to disturb.

Woman: Here, aren't... Aren't you the Prime Minister?

PM: Er, yes. In fact, I am. Merry Christmas.

Woman: Oh.

PM: Part of the service now. Trying to get round everyone by New Year's Eve.

PM: Ah. Hello. Does Natalie live here?

Kids: No, she doesn't.

PM: Oh dear. OK.

Kids: Are you singing carols?

PM: Er, no. No, I'm not.

Kids: Please, sir, please. Please.

PM: Well, I suppose I could.

Kids: Please.

PM: All right.

(song) Good King Wenceslas looked out On the feast of Stephen When the snow lay round about Deep and crisp and even Brightly shone the moon that night

PM: Hello. Sorry to disturb. Does Natalie live here?

Mia: No. She lives next door.

PM: Ah. Brilliant.

Mia: You're not who I think you are, are you?

PM: Yes and I'm sorry about all the cock-ups. My cabinet are absolute crap. We hope to do better next year. Merry Christmas to you.

[ Scene #68 ]

PM: Ah. Hello. Is, er, Natalie in?

Natalie: Oh, where the fuck is my fucking coat? Oh. Hello.

PM: Hello.

Natalie: Erm, this is my mum and my dad and my Uncle Tony and my Auntie Glynne.

Woman: Hello.

PM: Very nice to meet you.

Natalie: And, erm...this is the Prime Minister.

Mom: Yes, we can see that, darling.

Natalie: And erm, unfortunately, we're very late.

Mom: **It's the school Christmas concert, you see, David. And it’s the first time all the local schools have joined together, even St Basil's, which is most…

Natalie: Too much detail, Mum.

Dad: Anyway, how can we help, sir?

PM: Well, I...just needed Natalie... on some state business.

Mom: Oh.

Dad: Right, yes. Of course. Right, er... Well, perhaps you should come on later, Plumpy.

Er, Natalie.

PM: I don't want to make you late for the concert.

Natalie: No, it's nothing, really.

Mom: Keith'll be very disappointed.

Natalie: No, really, it doesn't matter.

Mom: The octopus costume's taken me months. Eight is a lot of legs, David.

PM: Mm. Erm... Listen, why don't I give you a lift and then we can talk about this state business business in the car.

Natalie: OK.

Dad: Lovely, yes.

Mom: Thank you.

Man: Hold tight, everybody.

PM: How far is this place?

Natalie: Just round the corner.

PM: Ah, right. Well, er... I just wanted to say... thank you for the Christmas card.

Natalie: You're welcome. Look, I'm so sorry about that day. I came in and he slinked towards me and there was a fire and he's the President of the United States and nothing happened, I promise. I just felt like such a fool because... I think about you all the time, actually. And I think you're the man that I really...

Kid: We're here.

Natalie:.. Love.

PM: Oh, wow. That really was just round the corner.

Well, look, l... I think I'd better not come in, you know? The last thing anyone wants is some sleazy politician stealing the kids' thunder.

Natalie: No, please come. It'll be great.

PM: No, I...I better not. But I will be very sorry to drive away from you.

Natalie: Just give me one second…

[ Scene #69 ]

Man1: John's been very mysterious. Where did you two meet?

Jack: Erm...erm...

Judy: Um...um...

Sam: No!

Natalie: Come on in. We can watch from backstage.

PM: OK. Terry, I won't be long. Look, this has to be a very secret visit, OK?

Natalie: Don't worry. This was my school. I know my way around. Come on.

[ Scene #70 ]

Karen: Look, the sheep are ready already and you're not even... Oh, David.

PM: Ah! Oh, how are you? Hi, guys. Hey, hey, hey. Are you all right?

Karen: What the hell are you doing here?

PM: Well, you know...I…

Karen: I always tell your secretary’s secretary’s secretary these things are going on - but it never occurred to me you'd actually turn up…

PM: Well, I thought it was time I did. I didn't want anyone to see, so I'm gonna hide somewhere. Good luck, Daisy, good luck, Bernie.

Karen: I've never been gladder to see my stupid big brother. Thank you.

PM: All right.

Karen: Oh, now. We haven't been introduced.

PM: Right. Well, this is Gavin.

Karen: Hello, Gavin.

PM: My copper. And this is Natalie, who's my, erm... who's my, erm, catering manager.

Karen: Oh.

Natalie: Hi.

Karen: Catering manager. Watch he keeps his hands off you. 20 years ago, you'd have been his type.

Natalie: I'll be very careful. Don't try something, sir, just because it's Christmas.

Karen: No, seriously.

Karen: Come on. Showtime. Quickly. Look, see you after, yeah?

PM: Probably.

Karen: Thank you, Prime Minister.

PM: It's all right.

Natalie: Come on.

PM: Right.

[ Scene #71 ]

(song) Catch a falling star and put it in your pocket Save it for a rainy day Catch a falling star And put it in your pocket Never let it fade away Never let it fade away Never let it fade away

man: Hillier School would now like to present their Christmas number. Lead vocals by ten-year-old Joanna Anderson, backing vocals coordinated by her mother, the great Mrs Jean Anderson. Erm, some of the staff have decided to help out and for this, we ask you to forgive us. Thank you.

(song) I don't want a lot for Christmas There's just one thing I need I don't care about the presents Underneath the Christmas tree I just want you for my own More than you could ever know Make my wish come true All I want for Christmas Is you I don't want a lot for Christmas There's just one thing I need I don't care about the presents Underneath the Christmas tree I just want you for my own More than you could ever know Make my wish come true All I want for Christmas is you You baby Oh, all the lights are shining So brightly everywhere And the sound of children's laughter fills the air Laughter fills the air Everyone is singing Oh yeah I hear those sleigh bells ringing Santa won't you bring me my honey Won't you please bring my baby to me I don't want a lot for Christmas This is all I'm asking for All I'm asking for I just wanna see my baby Standing right outside my door Cos I just want you for my own More than you could ever know You will ever know Make my wish come true All I want for Christmas Is you All I want for Christmas And you and you And you and you All I want for Christmas All I want for Christmas

PM: Right. So, not quite as secret as we'd hoped.

Natalie: What do we do now?

PM: Smile. Take a bow. And a wave.

[ Scene #72 ]

Karen: Absolutely no idea. I mean, can you imagine? I'll see you later, all right? I'll speak to you. Bye.

Tell me, if you were in my position, what would you do?

Harry: What position is that?

Karen: Imagine your husband bought a gold necklace and, come Christmas, gave it to somebody else.

Harry: Oh, Karen...

Karen: Would you wait around to find out...

Woman: Good night.

Karen: Night, darling. Happy Christmas. Would you wait around to find out if it's just a necklace or if it's sex and a necklace or if, worst of all, it's a necklace and love? Would you stay? Knowing life would always be a little bit worse? - Or would you cut and run?

Harry: Oh, God. I am so in the wrong. A classic fool.

Karen: Yes, but you've also made a fool out of me. You've made the life I lead foolish, too. Darling. Ooh, darlings! Oh, you were wonderful. My little lobster, you were so... What is that word? Orange. Come on, I've got treats at home. Dad's coming.

[ Scene #73 ]

Daniel: Sammy! Fantastic show! Classic drumming, son.

Sam: Thanks. Plan didn't work, though.

Daniel: Tell her, then.

Sam: Tell her what?

Daniel: That you love her.

Sam: No way. Anyway, they fly tonight.

Daniel: Even better. Sam, you've got nothing to lose and you'll always regret it if you don't. I never told your mom enough. I should have told her every day because she was perfect every day. You've seen the films, kiddo. It ain't over till it's over.

Sam: OK, Dad. Let's do it. Let's go get the shit kicked out of us by love.

Daniel: Yes.

Sam: Just give me one sec.

Daniel: Yeah.

Daniel: Oh, I'm sorry.

Carol: Sorry.

Daniel: That's OK. My fault.

Carol: No, no, really, it wasn't. You're Sam's dad, aren't you?

Daniel: Yeah. Stepdad, actually. Daniel.

Carol: I'm Carol.

Daniel: Carol.

Sam: OK, I'm back. Let's go.

Daniel: Yeah. Well... I hope we'll meet again, Karen.

Carol: Carol. (Laughs) I'll make sure we do.

Daniel: Yeah? Good.

Carol: (laughs)

Sam: Tell her.

Daniel: What?

Sam: You know...

Daniel: Don't be such an arse.

Sam: Look, there she is.

Daniel: Where?

Sam: Over there. Oh, no.

Daniel: It's OK, we'll go to the airport. I know a short cut.

[ Scene #74 ]

(All spoken Portuguese)

Jamie: Good evening. Senhor Barros?

Barros: Sim.

Jamie: I am here to ask your daughter for her hands in marriage.

Barros: You want to marry my daughter?

Jamie: Yes.

Barros: Come here, there is a man at the door. He wants to marry you.

Aurelia'sister: But I've never seen him before.

Barros: Who cares?

Aurelia'sister: You're going to sell me to a complete stranger?

Barros: Sell? Who said sell? I'll pay him.

Jamie: Pardon me. I'm meaning your other daughter - Aurelia.

Barros: She's not here - she's at work. I'll take you. You ! Stay here.

Aurelia'sister: As if I would. Stupid! Father is about to sell Aurelia as a slave to this Englishman.

Aurelia'sister: You better not say yes, Father.

Barros: Shut up, Miss Dunkin' Donut 2003.

[ Scene #75 ]

Daniel: Look, we're not actually flying.

airport gate man: You can't come through.

Daniel: Not even to let the boy say goodbye to the love of his life?

airport gate man: No.

Daniel: I'm sorry, Sam.

airport gate man: Boarding pass, sir?

Rufus: Just give me a moment, I know I've got it here – if you’d just – could you hold that for a second. There we go – now – it’s – if you could just hang on to this…

Daniel: Unless...

Sam: What?

Daniel: Do you want to make a run for it? Hold on to that.

Sam: Do you think I should?

Daniel: Yeah.

Sam: OK.

Daniel: Yes!

Rufus: I must have left them where I was having a cup of coffee. I’m sorry.

[ Scene #76 ]

Aurelia'sister: Apparently he is going to kill Aurelia.

all: Cool!

[ Scene #77 ]

Sam: Joanna.

Joanna: Sam?

Sam: I thought you didn't know my name.

Joanna: Course I do.

Sam: Oh, Jesus. Here, I've got to run.

[ Scene #78 ]

(All Spoken Portuguese)

Barros: Where is Aurelia?

R.P.: Why should I tell you?

Barros: This man wants to marry her.

R. P.: He can't do that - she's our best waitress.

Jamie: Boa noite, Aurelia.

Aurelia: Boa noite, Jamie.

Jamie: Beautiful Aurelia... I've come here with a view to asking you...to marriage me. I know I seems an insane person because I hardly knows you but sometimes things are so transparency, they don't need evidential proof. And I will inhabit here, or you can inhabit with me in England.

Aurelia'sister: Definitely go for England, girl. You'll meet Prince William -then you can marry him instead.

Jamie: Of course I don't expecting you to be as foolish as me, and of course I prediction you say no.... but it's Christmas and I just wanted to...check.

Aurelia'sister: Oh, God - say yes, you skinny moron.

Aurelia: (English) Thank you. That will be nice. Yes is being my answer. Easy question.

Barros: (Portuguese) What did you say?

Aurelia: Yes, of course.

all: Bravo!

Jamie: (English) You learned English?

Aurelia: Just in cases.

[ Scene #79 ]

Joe: Hello, Daisy.

Billy: This one's Greta.

Joe: Hello, Greta.

Jamie: Well, here she is. This is Aurelia. This is Juliet, Peter...Oh, Mark, hi, didn't see you there.

Mark: Yeah, just thought I'd tag along.

Aurelia: Jamie's friends are so good-looking. He never tells me this. I think maybe now I have made the wrong choice, picked wrong Englishman.

Jamie: She can't speak English properly. She doesn’t know what she’s saying.

Daisy: Dad! Dad!

Harry: Oh, God.

Daisy: Did you get us any presents?

Harry: Matter of fact, I did.

Bernie: Thanks, Dad.

Harry: How are you?

Karen: I'm fine. I'm fine. Good to have you back. Come on. Home.

Sam: There she is.

Joanna: Hi.

Sam: Hello.

Daniel: Aw, he should have kissed her.

Carol: No, that's cool.

Tony: Hey. What are you two doing here?

Jack: I might get a shag at last.

Judy: Naughty.

Jack: Got to go.

Judy: Bye.

Colin: Yahoo! Now, this is Harriet.

Harriet: Hi. Really pleased to meet you.

Tony: Hello, Harriet.

Harriet: I hope you don't mind, I sort of brought my sister to stay… This is Carla. She's real friendly.

Carla: Hello, you must be Tony. I heard you were gorgeous.

PM: God, you weigh a lot.

Natalie: Oh, shut your face.

(song) God only knows what I'd be without you God only knows God only knows what I'd be without you God only knows what I'd be without you God only knows God only knows what I'd be without you God only knows what I'd be without you God only knows God only knows what I'd be without you God only knows what I'd be without you God only knows God only knows what I'd be without you God only knows what I'd be without you God only knows God only knows what I'd be without you God only knows what I'd be without you God only knows God only knows what I'd be without you God only knows what I'd be without you God only knows God only knows what I'd be without you God only knows what I'd be without you God only knows God only knows what I'd be without you ( Kelly Clarkson: The Trouble With Love Is) Love can be a many splendored thing Can't deny the joy it brings A dozen roses, diamond rings Dreams for sale and fairy tales It'll make you hear a symphony And you just want the world to see But like a drug that makes you blind It'll fool ya every time The trouble with love is It can tear you up inside Make your heart believe a lie It's stronger than your pride

[The end]